CHASE PLEASURE -ALL THE WAY TO YOUR GOALS

Pursuing pleasure is in our DNA. It’s what gives our life energy and direction.

And meaning.  

Back in the day we would leave the cave in order to get food, to get warmth, or to feel connected to other humans.

Because whatever activity we were rewarded for with different neurotransmitters, such as dopamine, perpetuated our survival.

Without it, we would have just curled up in a ball in a cave and died out as a species all together.

Because without pleasure, what would be the point?

So pleasure is our birth right. And it feels good.  

The sense of accomplishment you feel when you reach a goal. The cool water you get to drink after a soccer game. Jumping in a lake after a big run. The food you get to eat when you are hungry.

This kind of pure pleasure is something that has been in our environment for thousands of years and have helped our ancestors increase their odds of survival.

And your brain will memorize everything about the pleasure you just received… so that you can learn to do it again. And again.

However, times have changed…

With just a push of a button, pleasure is now all around us - video games, junk food, pornography, Netflix.  

You name it, and in less than 5 minutes you can have access to it.

And yet our brains are still seeking pleasure the exact same way our ancestors did.

But these newer forms of pleasure are obviously very different from the old kind.

These concentrated or “false pleasures” are things in our environment that have been concentrated to trick our brain into thinking that they are super important for our survival.

In fact, our brains think that false pleasures are the most important things in our life, because we have evolved to believe that anything that gives us a concentrated desire, concentrated reward, must be important.

Think of the difference between eating an apple vs. eating a slice of warm apple pie. 

If you love pie, there is no competition between the two.  

Your lower brain will explode in anticipation and will urge and desire you to eat it, because it literally thinks that the pie will help you survive longer. Much longer. Because it anticipates giving off such a huge dopamine hit.  

Versus just a mild one from the apple.

So if we follow our lower brain to chase pleasure for our survival, in our modern world it will soon lead us down exact opposite path it originally intended.

Instead of well-being and health and a fulfilled life – think of all the current epidemics our society is facing, such as obesity, diabetes, and addictions.  

Because the biggest problem with pursuing false pleasure is that it always leaves you wanting for more.  

And it is very challenging to be satisfied and feel complete when you are always wanting more of something that never satisfies you in the first place.

Because when you want water and you are thirsty, that water will give you a sense of satisfaction and you will then be at peace.

But when we drink soda or a glass of wine, not many of us end up saying – wow, that was so lovely. Now I feel satisfied.

Most of us enjoy it, and just want more. And more.

Same with sugar. Same with flour. Same with screen time.

So in order for our daughters to learn to take control of their lives, step number 1 is always learning to understand her brain first, and in this case how it is programmed to seek pleasure.

Because pleasure is wonderful, and hers for the taking.

She just has to learn to navigate it in a way that serves her.

Fortunately, being human comes with an advantage that no other animal possesses in the world – our prefrontal cortex, which is our human brain.

This part of our brain has our best (long-term) interest at heart and also has the ultimate veto power to override the lower brain, no matter how delicious a brownie might look.  

And this means that we don’t have to shut out our modern world…

With the help of our prefrontal cortex we can learn to get off this hamster wheel of false pleasures, when it’s time for us to move on.

So that we can experience the pleasures of pride, satisfaction, accomplishment, motivation, health, well-being, connection, love.

In pursuit of our bigger dreams, our audacious goals in life.